Remi Vignals

Anytime Baby!!

Remi is our 'Soul Climber'... For Remi, climbing is a spiritual experience, not just a sport. He commits exactly 98.6%* of his life to climbing. Everything else makes up the remaining 1.4%. (Sorry Delphine, that also includes you... only joking!!!... I bet that's the last time I get invited over for dinner!)

* This figure has been proven through sound mathematical analysis. The same analysis that American Banks used to stamp AAA ratings on their 'Sub-Prime' Securities.

Remi at last year's birthday party... the velvet suit just oozes style and the bear rug thrown over his chest reflects Remi's one-ness with things of nature!... and yeah, he looks young for his age.

Remi... he grew up fast, but is still interested in 'Toy Shopping', Grade 26 at Bob's Hollow

So what makes Remi our 'Soul Climber' and how spiritual is he about rocks and climbing?

Well, let's put it this way. Remi is so spiritual that he buys quickdraws called 'Phantoms', and carabiners called 'Spirits'.

He is so spiritual that he attends Christian Rock Festivals because they have the word 'Rock' in them.

He is so spiritual that he hates Bruce Willis for blowing up that giant space rock in the movie Armageddon... (Remi also cried at this point... and then for the next few weeks camped out the front of the local cinema where the movie was showing and held up a large sign that read 'Blasphemy!!')

For the non-climber readers, a couple of definitions:

1. A 'quickdraw' is a piece of climbing equipment consisting of two non-locking carabiners, attached by a nylon or 'spectra' sling. Remi prefers 'spectra' because it sounds more ethereal. 

1. Bruce Willis is an American actor, known for making enemies with European terrorists and large asteroids.

A typical looking quickdraw

Bruce Willis: Enemy to most bad people, including celestial bodies and 'Gimps'

In living with the wholesome ideals of a 'Soul Climber' and embodying the unyielding ethos of the spiritual warrior (try saying that after a few beers), whether it be daytime, nighttime, freezing cold, scorching hot, foggy, misty, snowing, pissing or pooing down, indoors or outdoors... REMI WILL CLIMB!

The following pics lay truth to this:

Even after the sun goes down and there's no light whatsoever... Remi Will Climb!

Even when the Rock Gods have decided to take a giant piss on him... Remi Will Climb!

Even when he has to push the rocks apart with his bare hands... Remi Will Climb!

Even when he has to eat from a straw and has a colostomy bag attached to his ass... Remi Will Climb!

Even when there is nobody else left on the cliff and the Universe is screaming 'Get the F%$# out of here!!!' by crashing waves 20 metres up the wall to tickle the soles of his little climbing shoes... Remi Will Climb!

Even when all the colour has left the photo... Remi Will Climb!

Even when Brian is dressed up like a pirate and passed out on somebody's floor... Remi Will Climb!

So why does Remi have this inherent and almost supernatural 'wanting' to climb?

Maybe it's the many hours Remi spends praying to the almighty 'Rock God' for another glorious day of climbing?

Maybe he sees dead people?

Who knows?!?!... But whatever Remi's motivations are and wherever his faith comes from, nothing seems to separate him from his calling. Even after two serious operations in 2010 and with his left arm barely able to lift a spoon to his mouth, when asked if he wanted to come to Yosemite, Remi's response was 'Anytime Baby!' 

Another example of this unwavering conviction to climb include immediately after our 'Epic Aid Adventure' at West Cape Howe in February 2011. When the rest of us were ready to retire and be content with climbing nothing harder than playground equipment for the remainder of our lives, Remi asked when we were planning to do it again!

We haven't been back yet!!

Well, that's all I can give you to provide a small insight into the team's 'Soul Climber'. I guess all that's left is to cap off Remi's greatest achievements to date:

1. Owning a 4WD that has more creature comforts than most people's homes! (including a fridge) So you know who to bum a ride with on your next weekend outing!
2. Being third climber on the 'Epic Aid Adventure'... all I remember is while cold and perched 50 metres above the ground, in possibly the most uncomfortable hanging belay known to humankind, I looked down 15 metres to see Remi lying on a nice big ledge all rugged up eating his lunch... 45 minutes later, with my legs going numb and ass feeling like it had been fed through a meat grinder, I looked down again and Remi was having a nap... I guess the Universe was taking care of him that day!

Finally, to finish off, I forgot to add this in the last post.

If you're interested in following Brian's climbing escapades, just want to stalk him or tell him to take a chill pill for being so angry, his blog is at: http://cliffhangerb.wordpress.com/.

Now the thank you's!!!

Thank you to all the readers so far... we've had 400 hits to date, with people logging in all the way from places such as Slovenia and Brazil... I don't think I even know anybody from Slovenia, but there's been 5 hits from there, so good stuff and hope you keep reading, whoever you are!

Also thanks to the commenters:

Scotty: Good to see you're still kicking it hard over there. Watch out for Carnies! They start coming out at this time of the year!!
Kelly: You wait till you meet Brian... you'd better have body armour on... he's still angry!! hahaha
Kristi: Ever faithful supporter... we've organised to have a headcam with us for the trip. Should make interesting video, especially when doing those pendulums!!! Keep on Bret. There's still time!
Brian: I'm so glad I haven't had my door kicked in yet!! Thanks for the beta on the weekend at Willy's. Was good getting back on the trad lead... I've missed it!

Until next time... keep it real everybody!!!!